I'm getting older as I get older

As we were making dinner I decided to turn on iTunes Radio station Peter, Paul, and Mary. It struck a chord with me (yes, pun intended). I started singing along to songs I knew and some I didn't. The Kingston Trio came on, and I found I really resonated with the simple folk songs of the 1960s.

It occurred to me and I even said it out loud to my wife: I'm getting older as I get older. That is to say, my tastes are de-progressing. I'm finding it true my own hairstyle and clothing. I've embraced my wavy hair instead of chopping it all off. Not only that, but I noticed a 1987 BMW 7 Series for sale on Algonquin Road - "make an offer". What's going on? (Don't worry, I'm too frugal to waste money on that).

Of course, I'm just old enough to know when a mid-life crisis hits. I thought it hit two years ago. Perhaps it did. However, I've sensed a greater need for nostalgia and a sense of the past. One can try to analyze these things. However, it's deeply personal and has a hint of sadness attached to it. While I have a strong biblical theology that settles my heart on the assurances of Christ, I still find how vulnerable I am to reminiscing. 

While it's not all sad, I think a recent trigger was when a high school marching band video clip was posted. It was 29 years ago and was right near the point that a lovely girl had lost her life just shy of 17. Aimee Colleen Thompson was a smart and beautiful young woman. She was driving home with her sister, Allison and her cousin Stacy when a tragic accident took their lives. I have generally kept to myself just how deeply I cared for Aimee. For a moment I thought she was in the video. I couldn't really tell. I decided to do a Google search for "Aimee Thompson Mainland" (that's the high school). I was floored to see the funeral notice in the local paper with her picture. 

This technology where old music can be piped in also offered a window to the past--a powerfully personal past. I sometimes don't know what to think about it. I make my living by technology. Yet there are days I long to divest of this digital wardrobe and embrace a simpler, older life. But it's not available to me except in my memories. This can be a trap. 

It is best to see God's purpose in the progress of time. Perhaps I will find ways to simplify my life. There's also nothing wrong with a little nostalgia. Yet the promise of the realized kingdom of Christ awaits fulfillment, and will be content to look forward and live in the assurance of such a grand finale to history -- and a resolution of my personal pain.

Unfinished Work

The Lord will fulfill His purpose for me. Lord, Your love is eternal; do not abandon the work of Your hands (Psalm 138:8, HCSB)

As we progress through the autumn ritual where farmers plow their fields to prepare for winter, I am reminded that there are seasons in our lives. These seasons provide a rhythm that paces our journey. God built that into the fabric of time; we are all bound to the clock and the tasks we must accomplish. Sometimes we're planting - developing new beginnings; other times we are harvesting and enjoying the fruit of our labor; and then there is a time to plow the field to start the process again.

Lately I have been wrestling with a sense of unfinished work in this season in my life. I am grateful for the opportunities I have been given. Yet now after more than a year has passed since I resigned as an associate pastor, I find I am unable to let go the desire to serve Christ in some way that in the pastoral office. This desire corresponds to 1 Timothy 3:1: 

"This saying is trustworthy: 'If anyone aspires to be an overseer, he desires a noble work.'" 

If I am honest (transparency was something I promised), I do aspire to this noble work. 

I can't seem to shake the desire, but I also recognize this is not going to be something I can manufacture. I have spent hours reflecting on the past years: the mistakes I made, the challenges I faced, and the doubts I still have. I have tried to study again with some intentional force - a drive that I am retooling for ministry. Yet the only way this will blossom is if God is in it. I am willing for the Lord to do what HE will do in my life - and YES, that scares me. For those who understand all of this, I ask for prayer. I also pray that the Lord be the master farmer in my life and in those with whom I am in relationship / community - my friends and family - and most importantly my wife, whom has been a bulwark of support through all these difficult seasons. 

The Road to Godliness with Contentment

At the risk of jinxing myself, I have taken great care not to get a speeding ticket since 1987. It’s not that I’m the safest driver on the road or that I am excessively careful about speed limits. I just learned my lesson in ’87 (like the rhyme?), and I don’t wish to pay for new roads via petty traffic citations.

I attribute any progress in this area of my life from God driving me towards a sense of contentment. This is harder in real life than it is to type it out. Like many people, I am not content by nature. In fact, as previously I confessed my sin of perfectionism, perfectionists are by definition discontented with virtually everything. This is not limited to inanimate objects—things that I own or desire to own—it’s sadly a discontentment (disappointment) with people.

When I drive around town (trying to drive close to the limit), I notice how often people desire that I speed up. Now I confess that I’m the sort that will gently tap the breaks to signal I am not in a hurry. Naturally, this does little to improve my relationship with the driver in my rear view mirror! Objects in the mirror may be closer than they appear, both in physical proximity to my rear bumper and also in a shared impatience and discontentment. I am impatient at their impatience, so I traded in my self-deluded notions of contentment for a disguised version of discontent—the variation of perfectionism I had hoped to jettison from my wretched life. The truth as I stand at the mirror of self-examination by means of biblical prodding (see James 1:22-25) is that the Spirit of God has far more work to do in me if I have the courage to act upon it.

If anyone teaches other doctrine and does not devote himself to the sound words of our Lord Jesus Christ and the teaching that is in accordance with godliness, he is conceited, understanding nothing, but having a morbid interest concerning controversies and disputes about words, from which come envy, strife, slanders, evil suspicions, constant wrangling by people of depraved mind and deprived of the truth, who consider godliness to be a means of gain. But godliness with contentment is a great means of gain. For we have brought nothing into the world, so that neither can we bring anything out. But if we have food and clothing, with these things we will be content. But those who want to be rich fall into temptation and a trap and many foolish and harmful desires, which plunge those people into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all evil, by which some, because they desire it, have gone astray from the faith and have pierced themselves with many pains. 1 Timothy 6:3-6 (Lexham English Bible).

Noticing in particular verses 5-6, “…godliness to be a means of gain. But godliness with contentment is a great means of gain…” I see the danger I face whenever I contemplate church ministry as a vocation (i.e. career). Paul is telling Timothy (from the context even back to chapter 3) that Christian character is exceptionally important. Disciples of Jesus face a constant temptation to be discontented with their lot. I reflect on over five years invested in training for church ministry, both in academic training and real-life church experience as an associate pastor. I wish to be quite transparent when I say: I seldom knew contentment and godliness as a cooperative trait in my life. I was mostly discontented with things around me in the church that I felt should change. I arrogantly thought (perhaps not intentionally) that I was the one to inaugurate that change. The ugly truth is that many a minister have manipulated people (once again, the pastor himself may be blind to this ambition), and perfectionism and a lack of true contentment may be a key reason.

I believe that if any ministry awaits me (whether it be a career path or volunteer), Christ must help me put to death the sin of perfectionism. A few steps I believe to be important to this outcome:

1. Confess this regularly to Christ and others. I rest on the assurance that Christ has already paid for this sin (like all other sin) on the cross. Yet the power of confessing this is a reminder of the gospel’s power in my life (cf. Romans 1:16-17, James 5:16).
2. Learn to recognize my emotional state that might point to discontentment, despair, and disillusionment. There are triggers that I need to detect ahead of time - a type spiritual "accident avoidance" (e.g. don’t let the world of consumption and advertising frame my mindset).
3. Find contentment in the simplicity of abundant life granted in Jesus Christ. John 10:10 aptly states: “The thief comes only so that he can steal and kill and destroy; I have come so that they may have life, and have it abundantly.” If I am discontented, rest assured the thief is at work undermining the truth of the gospel in my life.

So when on the road we should look out for one another, find contentment even when traffic slows (or pushes us), and let perfectionism get off at the nearest exit.

High Maintenance Man

I’m not quite sure how to take this: I was searching for some clip art for the phrase “high maintenance,” and most of the results pictured women in a frazzled state. First, I’m married to the world’s lowest maintenance person. So these skewed Google clip art results came as a surprise. Second, I know plenty of gentlemen who have displayed their fair share of high maintenance behaviors—myself being at the top of the list. The sad truth is that I am only now realizing this fact (and I’m grateful for a wife who is quite understanding and patient): I AM HIGH MAINTENANCE. Heaven knows this is true—just not sure what took me so long to see it.

If one subscribes to Myers-Briggs personality types, as an INTJ it seems that I constantly process stimuli and ponder their implications. This unending thinking has some benefits, but it can also drain the life out of me. I find it very hard to unwind, to enjoy life, and to take things at face value. I half expect I would be diagnosed for OCD if I really cared to go to a doctor about it.

I’m sure all of this is under the umbrella of perfectionism (and yes, I would admit that is a failing of mine). In fact, probably perfectionism and high maintenance are partners in crime.

Now all of that said, perfection is a concept that has its place in biblical theology and the Christian hope:

“I asked the Lord three times about this, that it would depart from me. But he said to me, “My grace is enough for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” So then, I will boast most gladly about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may reside in me. Therefore I am content with weaknesses, with insults, with troubles, with persecutions and difficulties for the sake of Christ, for whenever I am weak, then I am strong.” (2 Corinthians 12:8-10 NET Bible).

Paul was making a point that weakness is not a failing for the Christian servant, but rather can be a mark of Christ’s work in progress. Notice that Paul (in a very vulnerable moment) directly asked the Lord for the removal of his weakness (the nature of which was not revealed to the reader). Paul did not whine on Facebook or sit around in a coffee bar seeking caffeine consolation from his cronies. He went to Christ and three times petitioned for a solution. Perhaps one lesson I should take is that I cannot find my answers in another person, though certainly having people in my life is essential. Paul appears to model the proper attitude for believers (in the context, the Christians in Corinth were a bit of elitist and looked down on Paul’s weakness). That attitude is a paradox: when I am weak, in Christ I am strong.

So as one who readily admits I am weak, I hope to mirror Paul’s authentic humility as a broken vessel. Truthfully, I don’t feel content with weaknesses. Thus, it seems it is my lack of contentment that is the very weakness through which Christ wishes to demonstrate his power. I do not know what that will look like exactly. Perhaps that is the very first step I need to take – to let go of knowing every step – to discover contentment by telling Jesus every morning this day will not be perfect, and I will fail. Blessed be the Lord, who through my weakness can perfectly show what my life should be: in his grip.

Forks in the Road

Not always so obvious

It is very popular to hear people speak of their "journey". It might be a spiritual journey or career path, but most of us speak about direction and making progress towards a goal in life. I find it interesting that most often those moving metaphors speak to the unpredictable nature of life. Most of us are familiar with the concept of a "fork in the road", meaning we are speaking about important decisions that lie in our path. Take one route (to the exclusion of the other), and we think we can expect one outcome; the other road (whether less traveled or not) will yield a different outcome.

How many of our decisions do we find are monumental? Perhaps only after we chose a path did we realize in the rear view mirror that was a really big decision - one that will alter our life's course forever. It sure would be nice to have it all so easily mapped out: every ramification for all our choices laid out in advance so we can intelligently chose the best course. That can be really true with how we spend our money. I look back at all the times we ate out and nothing to show for it except a few extra pounds. It's also true in how we desire to serve the Lord with our time, talents, and treasures.

Yet God does reveal the most important stuff:

“The secret things belong to the Lord our God, but the things that are revealed belong to us and to our children forever, that we may do all the words of this law." Deuteronomy 29:29 English Standard Version (ESV). 

Funny how we really don't believe this to the fullest, for too often I press the gas pedal and miss the signposts warning me that the bridge is out or there is a tight curve ahead. As I speed right on through my 40s, I pray the Lord to intervene when I lose sight of the Word on the road. May the Lord Jesus keep me from injuring others in my life by careless life driving. May God guide me and those around me to the everlasting kingdom of Jesus Christ, through whom our life's engines must be powered. Amen.

Over Analysis or Just Appropriate Critical Thinking?

Do you ever find yourself over-analyzing life? The phrase "analysis paralysis" may accurately describe how I think about life and stuff. I have this working assumption that most people don't suffer from this malady; I assume most people merrily proceed with their lives oblivious to those of us who second-guess the norm. Perhaps that is a bad assumption, but that is how I feel sometimes.

Take church life for example: I have been in church since I was a baby. Ha! I even remember the nursery I was in at the Flomich Avenue Baptist Church in Holly Hill, Florida. Since then I have moved to Church of God as a teen, joined a Presbyterian church for a year while engaged to Bethanne, was in a non-denominational church for over 6 years in Chicago, then another non-denominational church in Park Ridge, Illinois. Then in 2000 we began our life in a Baptist church in Chicago's Jefferson Park neighborhood. Now since 2011 we have been members of Harvest Bible Church in Crystal Lake. In all of these churches I have wrestled with how church is done: the doctrines, practices, structure, and preaching. Yes, even as a youngster I recall thinking and evaluating sermons I heard. I remember the pastor at Flomich always had extended altar calls, singing all 6 verses of Just As I Am.

At my stage in life, having left vocational church ministry in 2011, I find that my formal theological training and my life experience has produced an almost debilitating side-effect: I over-analyze everything. I can't turn it off! I was taught in college how to develop critical thinking skills (as if I needed anyone to teach me how to be critical!). I go over and over things in my head until I almost explode. At least I have matured enough to tone down personal criticism (at least in what I say out loud).

Truthfully, I find great value in reflective observation:

What I fear, however, is that while such a process is invaluable and I encourage people to develop critical thinking skills, it has a downside in Christian discipleship. Why? Because I feel I must test everything. I analyze everything that is said, especially in a sermon. I never take things at face value - I have to test it against what I believe Scripture affirms. It can be exhausting and discouraging to say the least.

Yes, I know that churches of many kinds operate in a belief that they hold to Scripture. Yet so many denominations hold different teachings and positions, even if they have a high view of Scripture. The reason for these differences is hermeneutics: "the study of the principles of interpretation, i.e., the consideration of the theories behind exegesis" (Voelz, James W. 1997. What Does This Mean? [Concordia Scholarship Today] [Kindle Locations 6502-6503]. Concordia Publishing House. Kindle Edition.). In other words, our working theories of how to determine what the Bible affirms are applied within a Christian congregational setting, which has direct bearing on operating systems of belief. It underscores what is taught and what is emphasized by every Bible teacher and pastor who uses Scripture as the basis for their sermons.

Now that I am not in vocational ministry I am taking time to re-examine my personal theories of biblical interpretation and how it is practiced in church settings. My prayer is that God will help me center on Christ and develop a personal discipleship regimen that conquers my analytically-challenged processing. In other words, I hope to re-affirm what is most important and yet come to terms with some developing discoveries I feel God is showing me: He is much bigger than I ever knew! Apparent differences between genuine believers may find the Bible affirms both positions in ways that will blow us all away. I guess what I am saying is: I am not content to hold to the party line of a particular denomination, because I think true Christian unity can be fostered when thoughtful reflection of our hermeneutics are pursued. Assumptions are the enemy of true unity, and authentic Christian growth.

2 Timothy 2:15 (NET)

Make every effort to present yourself before God as a proven worker who does not need to be ashamed, teaching the message of truth accurately.

Transparent Journaling

It has been far too long since I have deliberately written my thoughts and reflections. Much has transpired in my life during the recent couple of years, and I find journaling is helpful. What might be even more helpful is to share this journal for anyone to see. So this is my attempt at transparent journaling.

Obviously, I could invite criticism for what I say. I like ponder many things and see myself as something of an independent thinker. What I do not intend to do is attack individuals, whether publicly known or simply private persons with whom I have had an association. No, this is about some personal growing pains I have endured, as well as musings over theoretical and practical theology. I am currently not serving as a pastor in a church, but I am open to that possibility down the road. This time is meant to retool and rethink. Thus, my blog is being resurrected for the purpose of openly expressing my thought journey.

Vulnerability means I must trust someone else. As this picture shows, to tackle tough issues requires concentration and a bit of faith. My faith has been tested, but I think it has come out stronger.

Jared reaching up and looking foward

As I start to express some of those issues with which I have been wrestling, I invite the reader to see God's loving providence and untold faithfulness towards a most undeserving fellow. Though what I write about may at times use theological terminology and technical jargon, I will attempt to bring it back down to earth so that others may actually benefit from this.

Godspeed!

Salvation always by grace, but...

Leviticus 9:23b-24: "When they came out, they blessed the people, and the glory of the Lord appeared to all the people. Then fire went out from the presence of the Lord and consumed the burnt offering and the fat parts on the altar, and all the people saw it, so they shouted loudly and fell down with their faces to the ground."

The NET Bible (the version used above) makes an interesting comment, noting that while other English Bibles suggest shouting for joy, it is more likely they shouted in terror and fell in horror at seeing the glory of God literally burn the offerings right in front of them. This is hardly a time to question one's salvation!

If one were to ask the Israelite congregation at this moment if they believed their salvation was by grace, they would first have to pick themselves off the ground and recover their composure, since they surely must have thought their lives were over. They were not prepared for the display of God's glory, nor the heavy burden of the law. It is easily understood, then, why theologians debate if the Old Testament saints were saved in a different way than how believers are saved in New Testament era: works versus grace.

It is important to realize that grace alone by faith alone has always been the vehicle for salvation (cf. Genesis 15:6; Romans 4:3; Galatians 3:6; James 2:23). Though looking forward to the seed of Abraham (i.e. Christ), their experience and understanding of such grace would have naturally been deficient given the demands of the Law of Moses. Theologically, the truth is that salvation is always by grace. Experientially, the OT believers would probably be unable to express any real understanding of it in light of God's overwhelming holiness.

On this side of the cross, NT believers can rejoice without fear and approach with boldness the throne of grace (Hebrews 4:16). This indeed is much better than falling in terror before the LORD. How wonderful that because of Christ's substitutionary atonement (the once-for-all sacrifice), we who are in Christ can approach the Father and cry "Abba" without fearing our own destruction.

Experience Reflected

I have just completed the Community Analysis course at Moody Graduate School. This course is designed to provide research and analysis experience relating to understanding a local context and making strategic ministry decisions. With my completion of this course, only three courses remain to complete my Master of Ministry program for which I anticipate graduating in May 2010.

A very interesting feature of the class was Dr. John Fuder's dissertation he did in training urban ministry students in field work. His book, Training Students for Urban Ministry: An Experiential Approach, is engaging and convicting. A penetrating analysis of the emotional one takes when experiencing first-hand the tragedy of extreme urban need, the journey from an inward self-absorption to motivated compassion and conviction is palpable. He takes various experiential learning models and customizes it with the ministry training that so often lacks the down-and-dirty.

The process itself incorporates classroom theory and presentation and then moves out of the classroom to enter the street-level reality of urban life. This experience jolts the learner and creates a myriad of emotional responses, which are largely dependent on prior experience and the predisposition of the student. God himself enters the process at various points to draw from the experience a powerful, affective learning response. Extending far beyond theoretical knowledge is the possibility of wisdom and conviction that can be seasoned with the spices of compassion. From this learning experience, the student is now positioned to make conscience decisions to take the Good News of Jesus Christ to a receptive and broken world.

I feel my role as an associate pastor is to help comfortably middle-class believers take a few steps in the journey. With my current educational career in its final stages, I foresee many years of the journey in my current context in Chicago to inculcate a motivated compassion for the lost--a journey centered on the biblical gospel. I know that my own feeble efforts will yield little. I pray God takes this seed and waters it with the Holy Spirit and produce much fruit.

Pastor Jared

My Review of Onkyo 7.1 Channel Home Theater Black Receiver

Abt Electronics

Onkyo 7.1 Channel Home Theater Black Receiver - TXSR876B/ 140W x 7/ HDMI v1.3/ THX Ultra2 Plus Certification/ All Discrete Circuitry/ Optimum Gain Volume/ Audyssey Dynamic EQ/ Dolby Digital Plus Dolby TrueHD DTS-HD Master Audio Decoder/ HDMI Deep Color Capable (36bit)/ 1080p Upscaling Via HDMI/ Ana...

Onkyo 7.1 Channel Home Theater Black Receiver

Strong contender

Jared Tremper Chicago, IL 1/30/2009

 

5 5

Pros: Accurate Controls, Easy To Set Up, Good Power, Durable, Clean Sound

Best Uses: Home Theater, Larger Rooms, Smaller Rooms

Describe Yourself: Musically Inclined, Practical, Tech Savvy

While I was not in a position to compare against other units in this class, I believe anyone looking to build a new or improve existing home theater setup should have this on the top 3. For the price it stands on its own as solid mix of power and ease of use. CD music has new life, with an array of surround remix options. High definition audio sources are given every option to do its thing. The built-in HD radio tuner is a very nice extra; HD radio restores enjoyment to over-the-air music playback. As with other features in this unit, it is a compelling future-proofing capability.

The unit itself is beefy, both in weight and physical size. Do not underestimate this; ideally you should have 2 people to physically setup the unit. Some reviews remark on heat generation, and there is some to be sure. I recommend you install it to allow good air movement to radiate the heat.

Simply put, after upgrading from a sub-$300 4+ year old unit, the Onkyo 876 series is an outstanding centerpiece to home theater configurations well worthy of your consideration. I strongly recommend that a home theater configuration not go cheap on the receiver, and this unit gives plenty of bang for the buck!

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Make the Main Thing the Main Thing

"Advantage is gained in war and also in foreign policy and other things by selecting from many attractive or unpleasant alternatives the dominating point. American military thought had coined the expression “Over-all Strategic Objective.” When our officers first heard this, the laughed; but later on its wisdom became apparent and accepted. Evidently this should be the rule, and other great business be set in subordinate relationship to it. Failure to adhere to this simple principle produces confusion and futility of action, and nearly always makes things much worse later on" (Winston Churchill).

Christians should certainly resonate with this. How easily we are distracted by what is "permissible" even as we overlook was is paramount: the Gospel. Culture wars, the polarized political landscape, and a shallow understanding of history are just a sampling of our tactical blundering. Believers must reestablish the Bible as the central force of mission, which necessarily requires we set aside pet projects for the "over-all strategic objective." It's time to regroup!

Christmas Ideals

From the view of our front window and in the colors of Christmas it should be of those moments where idealism is realized. Of course depending on the fleeting external components of an artificial holiday sadly misses the mark.

Each year this innate hope for a white Christmas is fueled by the creation of expectations from someone else's idealism. In fact, there is a magazine called Ideals that specifically creates this imaginary world that could only exist in the pages of a periodical.

And yet each year I wait in eager expectation of a white Christmas and the joyous affects of shared merrymaking. Giving gifts; singing carols; candles and trees and snow. It all coalesces in a Christmas collage that has been carefully created by someone else.

So as much as I can control the impulses I set out to make each Christmas season my own ideal no longer dependent on someone's manufactured idealism. I set out to understand my own subtly pernicious desires and redirect them to the incarnation of Israel's hope that is the source of salvation for all. The Christ child who went on to live the ideal life of a servant--a slave--is my hope. More than the gift of everlasting life, Jesus is my Raison d'être and the focus of the idealism of all that will be fully realized in the age to come. Any celebration of Christmas without the foregrounding of Immanuel's mission is like a gift-wrapped box full of packing peanuts and yet no gift. Yes, I will quite pleased to see snow covering the dirty streets of Chicago and take it as a gift from heaven. But I will be even more pleased when my own heart's attitudes match the "white as snow" condition of my soul purchased by my Savior.

Merry Christmas!

Fall 2007 Semester Nearly Finished...

So much to process with my Life of Christ class with Dr. Julius Wong Loi Sing of Moody Graduate School. I am in the final stages of my semester paper entitled: Consumerist Churchgoers to Cross-bearing Disciples: How Can Church Leaders Navigate the Distance in Late-modern America?

I will continue to reflect long after this class...I mean, it's Jesus!

Happy Christmas!

Lord, teach us to pray

Bethanne and I went to the UK and Ireland (see post from May 2007) on a group trip that explored many church history sites. After returning from a trip like this, most of us are glad to be back to the routine of life. I must confess it has been a bit more challenging to resume this life in Chicago.

I am still reflecting on the profound past that presses my understanding of what church history attempts to impart. It is likely I will be wrestling for many years to come.

The photo in this post was taken in Oxford, England. The Book of Common Prayer is still used today in many churches to guide worshipers in their corporate prayers.

I am reminded of Jesus' disciples who asked Lord "teach us to pray." The prayer that many of us know as the Lord's Prayer is a beautiful example of brevity and bravery. Its structure is obviously brief. However, as countless scholars and biblicists have analysed and discected it we find it contains an almost indescribable depth. I believe its bravery is found throughout but with particular pointedness in the words "lead us not into temptation." I have come to recognize this to mean a specific temptation to abandon God when being an authentic believer is decidedly difficult. Then as now many who profess their devotion to God when it is easy to do are tempted to walk away when times are tough.

How we need Jesus to teach us to pray. I recognize my weakness every day. Lord, do not allow us to waver from our confession of you. Deliver us, Oh God.

Read all about it - Tremper's head to London!

The latest news for Bethanne & Jared Tremper? We're heading to the United Kingdom on an extended study tour put on by the Moody Bible Institute. While there is no question it will be a type of vacation getaway for us, the intellectual stimulation of the trip may be more memorable. Visiting several sites with a significance to Church history, the trip is sure to be a life-changing experience for us--both in a personal and spiritual sense.

As we anticipate this trip, I reflect on my last time in London in 1986. That is when this snapshot was taken. I was hoping to capture the essense of the local culture. I have no idea who this gentleman is. Originally a colour photograph, the touch-up to make it appear older seems appropriate of the subject and scene. This is London to me.

Book Review: "Winning the Race to Unity"

Dietrich Bonhoeffer often wrote of the contrast between “costly grace” and “cheap grace” and the meaning of taking one’s cross as Christ commanded his disciples. Many people talk of walking as a disciple, but Bonhoeffer exposes our talk and challenges the believer to lay down one’s life for Christ.

Schuler (2003) has powerfully grappled this idea in his book, “Winning the Race to Unity: is Racial Reconciliation Really Working?” from which a strikingly similar theme emerged. It correlated well with this personal ownership of discipleship vis-à-vis our responsibility for race relations in the American church. Moreover, this ownership involves the self-sacrifice of which Bonhoeffer speaks, noting the perilous times in Nazi Germany and the extreme personal risks one took when upholding authentic Christian values in the face of tyranny. How seriously do we take our vows of discipleship? Are we willing to risk our lives?

This question of personal risk is not far off from Shuler’s radar. Unfortunately, he has identified how far off the mark Evangelicals are in breaking the barriers to racial harmony. He notes that many might claim to care about the problem, but they have “shallow intentions” in their half-hearted attempts to ask what they can do or how to help be a part of the solution (p. 53). While it might grieve many sincere Christians to read this indictment, and to a large extent I recognize this as judgment against the community of so-called Evangelicals, the sixty-four thousand dollar question is: am I culpable, and if I acknowledge my culpability am I willing to take bold steps to offer a remedy in my own sphere of influence? Where do individual believers measure up against such appalling failures? Shuler has taken the risk of offending the powerful Evangelical world by calling our bluff.

What is even more disturbing is that I am woefully fearful and ashamed to recognize that I have actually retreated from my younger idealistic philosophy of reaching out to the African American. In high school I had many black friends—not just “associates” but real friends. I used to exchange tapes of rap music with my friends (1980’s rap is much different that our modern counterpart). I was in a marching band that embraced the black culture while allowing a cross-cultural exchange in the music we performed (e.g. Top 40 tunes). Fast-forward to my “career” days and I sadly recognize my predilection to cultivate predominantly upwardly mobile relationships—typical suburban business types who made no effort to engage African Americans. The office in which I worked for over seven years had less than 1% of its workforce comprised of blacks. We got around that because we employed many Indian nationals—of course the motivation was to procure highly educated yet lower cost engineering talent. My tacit acceptance of such practices underscores much of what Shuler identified as the problem. Powerful white me excluding minorities from leadership and influence—all the while I did nothing to seek justice in this environment. I was unwilling to risk my career as an IT manager by hiring people of color or to speak out within my own authority structure and influence.

Shuler rightly states that if one is “serious about improving race relations…this effort will cost you.” He asks if our Christianity has progressed to the point of rejecting man’s approval, instead seeking God’s agenda. If we claim to be Jesus’ disciple, then it must show in our choices—to be deliberate in going beyond “passive racism” and to learn of God’s heart about racial reconciliation (pp. 73-76).

Yet Shuler also argues that mere racial reconciliation is inadequate. Our task goes beyond the organizational and community to individual relationship building. Of course our churches must be deliberate to partner with African American believers. But he challenges us as individual disciples to step out in faith to risk our reputations, careers, power and authority, and where it really hits the road—our monies/budgets—to go beyond superficial, token actions into costly work and choices. Just as Bonhoeffer argues about costly grace, so too we must take up our cross and die to ourselves—to our preferences, our pocketbooks, and our pragmatism and step into a brave world—God’s kingdom world in way that reflects beatific ideals in an unjust reality.

Now this sounds great. However, Shuler acknowledges that this is easier said than done. He strongly argues that white believers must step up to the plate and demonstrate a serious commitment to the process. “People of color know the language and priorities of the majority culture in America because of the survival dynamics of the majority/minority systems…” white believers, communities, and leaders must reciprocate by deliberately learning the “cultures and histories of people of color” to earn some credibility and show authentic, self-less commitment. Whites must discern the good times and bad times in the diverse cultures of color—to “respond to the injustices suffered in America by blacks and other non-white citizens” (p. 302). It is likely white Christians will suffer hardship and rejection; the end result will be a stronger resemblance to our Savior and His kingdom ethic (cf. Matt 5-8).

A few action items I have taken upon myself: I will read The Souls of Black Folk (W.E.B. Du Bois), which is a highly recommend twentieth century work elucidating African-American studies; I am actively building relationships with people of color in Moody Grad School; and in my role as deacon in a majority white church I hope to foster dialogue that may lead to a partnership with a sister church in our denomination in an African-American community. As I study, learn, and build relationships I pray God will break my heart over this embarrassing stigma of the American church. I know that these meager actions will not solve the big problem of racial reconciliation, but Shuler has challenged me as an individual to do my part and with God’s help I will respond.

References

Bonhoeffer, D. (1959). The cost of discipleship. New York: Simon and Schuster.

Shuler, C. (2003). Winning the race to unity: is racial reconciliation really working? Chicago, IL: Moody Publishers.

Jesus Wept. Ask yourself why.

If you ask people what’s the shortest verse in the Bible, most people would instinctively reply “Jesus wept” (John 11:35). Most English translations render this identically (the exceptions being The New Living Translation [Then Jesus wept] and the New Century Version [Jesus cried]). Now, if you ask these same people why Jesus wept it is likely that anyone who knows the story will say that Jesus was saddened at the death of Lazarus. The story itself begins at John 11:1 and unfolds to the point when Jesus commands Lazarus to come out of the tomb. It is a significant story in the public ministry of Jesus as told only by the Evangelist author of the Gospel of John.

What is the significance of John’s isolated account of this miracle? The Evangelist prefers to call Jesus’ miracles “signs,” and the resurrection of Lazarus was Jesus seventh sign. Clearly a major emphasis of this account is to demonstrate Jesus authority over death. Christ had already expressed the purpose of the event in John 11:4 saying, “This sickness will not end in death but is for the glory of God, so that the Son of God may be glorified through it.” However, as the story unfolds Jesus acknowledges that “Lazarus has died” (vs. 14). The very next verse provides the explanation: “I’m glad for you that I wasn’t there so that you may believe.”

The Evangelist wrote the Gospel for one singular purpose: “but these are written so that you may believe Jesus is the Messiah, the Son of God, and by believing you may have life in His name” (John 20:31). He stressed that Jesus’ miracles were signs of authority of God’s anointed One—the Messiah, and that Jesus came to bring life to those who believe.

Yet how is John 11:35 illuminated with respect to the purpose of the Gospel? Many commentators and preachers have long contended that Jesus was sympathizing with the mourners. They suppose that Jesus had deliberately waited until Lazarus died in order to experience the pain of their loss. Of course we find out early on that Lazarus was a friend of Jesus: “…Lord, the one You love is sick” (John 11:3). It also is true that the mourners observed Jesus’ tears and concluded that he was overcome with grief for his friend: “So the Jews said, “See how He loved him” (John 11:36).

However, some careful examination of the text is now required. First, the reader must avoid drawing conclusions on the response of the crowd. While clearly they observed Jesus’ visible emotion, the Evangelist writes a startling detail that provides more clarity:

John 11:33-34
33 When Jesus saw her crying, and the Jews who had come with her crying, He was angry in His spirit and deeply moved. 34 “Where have you put him?” He asked.

“Lord,” they told Him, “come and see.”

The Holman Christian Standard Bible renders this stronger than most translations: “He was angry.” John 11:38-39 repeats this surprising reaction from Jesus:

38 Then Jesus, angry in Himself again, came to the tomb. It was a cave, and a stone was lying against it. 39 “Remove the stone,” Jesus said.

While other translations render it as “deeply moved” or “groaned,” the translators of the HCSB followed bolder scholarship in its rendering:

“He was angry in the spirit and distressed,” has controlled German interpretation to the present day, which generally departs from it only by way of stronger expression (cf. the Zürich Bible: “Er ergrimmte im Geist und empörte sich” = “He became angry in the spirit and was disgusted”; Heitmüller, “Er ergrimmte innerlich und brachte sich in Harnisch” = “He was inwardly angry and became enraged”). Such is the interpretation followed by Bultmann, Büchsel, Strathmann, Schnackenburg, Schulz, Haenchen, and Becker in their commentaries" (Beasley-Murray, G. R. Word Biblical Commentary: John. Word Biblical Commentary. Dallas: Word, Incorporated, 2002. Page 192.)

This provides increased clarity in Jesus’ emotional state: the weeping Messiah is hard pressed to be merely in sympathy with the mourners. Moreover, he is not personally in despair over his friend; there is a deeper reason for his outburst.

Until his anger is understood his tears will likewise be shrouded from its true significance. Beasley-Murray contend that Jesus was deeply moved to anger over their disbelief in God’s anointed Messiah—the Messiah who had already demonstrated six powerful signs. “It was this unbelief of the people of God in the presence of him who is the ‘Resurrection and the Life,’ arrived among them to call their friend and brother from the grave that made Jesus angry” (Beasley-Murray, G. R. Word Biblical Commentary: John. Word Biblical Commentary. Dallas: Word, Incorporated, 2002. Page 193).

If this interpretation is correct, then his tears certainly fall in new light. Beasley-Murray stress that Jesus came to the tomb with a purpose; his purpose was not to mourn, but to glorify God as the live-giving Messiah—the authorized Messenger and Savior. At the same time it is likely that Jesus was not wholly unmoved by the sight of despair, and his tears seem to mix indignation and frustration with “grief over the tragedy of the human situation, from which not even the people of God can extricate themselves” (Beasley-Murray, G. R. Word Biblical Commentary: John. Word Biblical Commentary. Dallas: Word, Incorporated, 2002. Page 194). Thus, Jesus wept for the larger human condition and not merely for Lazarus. His anger over disbelief is balanced with grief that even those who do believe are affected by this world’s pain that results from evil.

The glory of the Gospel is that Jesus overcame death (John 20-21). This good news that Jesus preached before his Passion was fulfilled because of his Passion. Jesus willingly suffered the cross to put an end to death’s final tyranny for those who believe (“…by believing you may have life in His name” John 20:31). The author of John would not have you think Jesus wept for Lazarus, but rather for you. For those who believe he weeps when we live in ignorance of our hope. For those who do not believe he cries over their unbelief. Jesus wept. Ask yourself why.

Tis the Season to Follow Jesus

Once again we come to Christmas Eve—that seemingly magical night when Santa travels the world bringing gifts to children. Adults may think they have a clearer understanding of the holiday, but sadly that is not evident. As I was standing in line at the grocery store yesterday (two days before Christmas), I had several minutes to observe the people all waiting to pay for their goodies, many of whom obviously were rushed. These days we don’t have to look at the people in the line because they’ve installed televisions in every line, no doubt enticing us to find that last-minute item on the list; ‘tis the season, right?

Luke 14:33 says, “In the same way, therefore, every one of you who does not say good-bye to all his possessions cannot be My disciple” (The Holy Bible: Holman Christian Standard Version. Nashville: Holman Bible Publishers, 2003). The voice of Jesus in this passage is a blow to the commercial portrayal of a baby who seemingly inspired our notion of giving gifts in celebrating his birthday. Somehow even Christians have gotten sucked into the race for gifts. Is this possession obsession limited to Christmas or even to our culture? It would seem the answer is no. Jesus’ speaks to all generations and cultures, and he’s drawing a line in the sand: true followers will let it all go.

Our problem is our tendency to cling tightly to material treasures or even human relationships. Jesus in verse 26 says “if anyone comes to Me and does not hate his own father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters—yes, and even his own life—he cannot be My disciple.” Nolland (2002) writes that the shocking word ‘hate’ is a classic expression of exaggeration where Jesus uses the word hate to connote unrestricted “freedom of action” as one is released from “ties that bind.” Nolland explains that Luke is emphasizing Jesus’ expectation that necessarily includes voluntary divestiture of all that encumbers the true disciple. He expects the follower of Jesus to live free from all human burdens and instead focus on total discipleship—including relinquishing all rights to a comfortable life on earth (Nolland, John. Word Biblical Commentary: Luke 9:21-18:34. Dallas: Word, Inc., 2002. Vol. 35B, p. 762-764). As J. Vernon McGee puts it, “These verses are simply saying that we should put God first. A believer’s devotedness to Jesus Christ should be such that, by comparison, it looks as if everything else is hated” (McGee, J. V. Thru the Bible Commentary. Nashville: Thomas Nelson, 1997. Vol. 4, p. 311).

So, is Jesus saying we must own nothing at all or to act viciously towards our friends and family? I would say no, for even in the context Jesus is not arguing that his follower be a hateful person. “A disciple must subordinate all earthly relationships to loyalty to Christ. Hate does not mean to bear ill will, but to choose Christ over all others” (Spirit Filled Life Study Bible. electronic ed., Lk 14:26. Nashville: Thomas Nelson, 1997). Thus, returning to verse 33, I believe the context instructs a true disciple to “say goodbye” and live with no strings attached to this world. When a Christian operates in this mode, that person will be generous, self-sacrificing, and passionate about God’s kingdom. They will also not retaliate when wronged, and will trust God for everything they need in this life and in eternity. Let those who claim to follow Jesus demonstrate detachment and show the world the true meaning of Christmas.

Do You Grieve for Your Adversary?

As I continue on my journey in Moody Graduate School this fall, my various assignments, readings, and papers have taken me to places I have seldom visited. In one class we are to write a paper on the Sermon on the Mount, commonly referenced as the Beatitudes. In another class (Old Testament Literature and Themes) I am reading through various Psalms of David. Certainly these two activities would not be related, right?

Wrong! Psalm 35:11-14 says:

Malicious witnesses come forward;
They question me about things
I do not know.
They repay me evil for good,
making me desolate.
Yet when they were sick,
my clothing was sackcloth;
I humbled myself with fasting,
and my prayer was genuine.
I went about grieving as if
for my friend or brother;
I was bowed down with grief,
like one mourning a mother.

So when Jesus declares in Matthew 5:44 "But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you..." I have to wonder how I missed this connection before. As David is called "a man after God's own heart" (1 Samuel 13:14), it amazes me to think Jesus was very much the "son of David." Jesus echoes God the Father's heart as the "exact representation" of the Father (Hebrews 1), and David's heart foreshadowed that of Jesus.

Thus, as a follower of Jesus I must allow both the Old Testament and New Testament to speak clearly. I confess that it's rare when I weep for my adversary as if he were my friend or brother. What may be even worse, I seldom pray for Christian brothers with whom I may be in disagreement. As Jesus continued in the sermon in Mt. 5:46-47, "For if you love those who love you, what reward will you have? Don't even tax collectors do the same? And if you greet only your brothers, what are you doing out of the ordinary?"

It is time that I do what is out of the ordinary. It's also time for the Church do the same. In our valiant efforts to be "people of the Book" we sometimes whack that Book on the heads of those who may be on the other side. Let us grieve as if for our friend. Let us be genuine in our prayers and love for those who persecute and deride us. Let us have the heart of Jesus Christ, the Saviour of the world.

Run To Your Weakness?

Having just returned to higher education after a hiatus, I can testify without shame that I'm a little rusty. This week marks my entry into Moody Graduate School, and I just dropped a class after realizing 15 semester hours is too heavy a load. I prefer to avoid death by aggregate paper cuts from reading too much! Of course I still have a lot with 12 semester hours, but I'm breathing a bit easier (just a bit!).

It takes courage to realize one's weaknesses. I know that I'm not the fastest reader, and in fact I prefer to read critically and thoughtfully in a way that is more rewarding to me even as it requires more effort (time). I have a luxury to reduce my load and avoid having my weakness be a problem. Yet there are times when it seems God purposefully leads us to weakness--in fact, it would seem almost always God uses us most often in our weakness.

This is a strange concept for most of us. Our culture tells us to build our self-worth by pursuing our strengths and developing them. Career guidance books often suggest that we consider "what would you do if money were no object?" as a way to ascertain what drives us and in what areas do we see our strengths. Corporate human resource managers strategize over this very idea, attempting to align an employee to the role best suited to one's strengths.

So why doesn't God do that? Simple: we'd take all the credit. Psalm 34:2 says "my soul makes its boast in the LORD; let the humble hear and be glad" (ESV). What a joy it is to read that. I am, in fact, glad about my weakness as it gives me an opportunity to highlight God's strength. Now we all desire to boast in something really excellent and worthy. Perhaps we should challenge ourselves to run towards our weaknesses, trusting in God to see how he'll display his glory. I know that's what my goal is as I press on in graduate school, facing my fears and weaknesses, but trusting in God's strength to get me through the challenge so that I can boast in him. As it says in Isaiah 40:29 "He gives power to those who are tired and worn out; he offers strength to the weak" (NLT).